I’m going to go straight to the words of the Buddha. I will let the Buddhist be the words of wisdom and I will just pass them on. One of the things I’d like to say is from the Dhammapada, and that is: “hatred never ceases by hatred. Only love ceases hatred. This is an eternal law.”

That’s the importance of loving kindness.

The teachings of the Buddha can really be summed up by one thing. That is to purify the mind; to abstain from evil. This is the teaching of all of the Buddhas.

What I’ve learned is going to sound very weird but I have learned to some degree to trust my pain. By turning into my pain I always find my heart. By turning into my fear I always find my heart. Most of the time in our lives we are taught to turn away from our fears and our pains, but I have discovered that by turning into the pain that is where the wisdom is to be found.

I have found my heart over and over and over again by turning into the pain, so I trust pain. Not that I want to welcome pain. And I would be the last person in line who wants to do with my pain. At the same time I trust that by turning into my pain I will find my heart.

That is the legacy that I would like to leave everyone.

We are so afraid of our pain. Turning into pain means to feel it, to acknowledge it, to be open to it. It’s good to know that we have never been betrayed. We are not forsaken. If we open up our heart into love, it will always be there for us; it will never go away.

The fear is that we have turned away from love. We have lost our connection to love. As we open our connection back into our fears we find our hearts again and our hearts are always love and the truth.

In my dying moments I wish to die with my eyes open, my heart open and find my heart in love.

I will tell you some words from Hlaing Tet Sayadaw, who I visited about four years ago. He was probably about 94 at the time. On my last night with him I said to him: “I am leaving tomorrow morning and I don’t know if I will see you again.”

And I never did see him again.

But I said to Hlaing Tet Sayadaw: “you have been a monk for more than 70 years. What are you going to do when death stops and knocks on your door?”

I was in my late forties at the time and I told him that I realized that death could come to me at any time as well.

He looked at me for a really long time and then he smiled and said something to me that surprised me. He said: “Bob are you afraid to die?”

He caught me off guard. I had asked him the question and he’s all right through it. I told him that I wasn’t ready to die and laughed nervously.

He looked at me for a really long time and then he said: “Bob, you need to meditate more!”

I said: “OK, OK! I will meditate more! But tell me, what are you going to do? What are you going to do when death knocks on your door?”

He looked at me for a really long time. Then he smiled and the told me something that I will never forget. He said: “if I see something I will be mindful of seeing it. If I hear something I will be mindful of hearing it. If I smell something I will be mindful of smelling it. If I taste something I will be mindful of tasting it. If I feel things in my body I will be mindful that there are sensations occurring in my body. If there are mind states rising while I am dying I will be aware that there are mind states. This is how I’m going to die and this is how I want you to die.”

On a few days after my grandmother’s 100th birthday I told her what Hlaing Tet Sayadaw had told me. Here was this hundred eight year old lady who was born in Russia. She has been through a lot in her life and she is beautiful with a great spirit. She turns to me and says: “you know, your teacher was a smart guy!”

She totally got it! Dying with your eyes open! Why not be fully present?

So those are my words of wisdom. Trust in your heart. Find your heart again and again, even in the midst of your pain. Don’t be afraid of your pain. Your heart is there waiting for you. It has just come in drag!

Again, this is from the Buddha. Cultivate the path of living as virtuously as possible. Live with integrity and your mind will be much fuller of ease, with less pain. Cultivate generosity. All of these things help the mind to become stiller with concentration that opens to wisdom.